Groomsman at a Wedding: The Ultimate Guide to the Role of the Groom’s Support

Being asked to be a wedding groomsman is an honourable role that involves more than just wearing a smart suit. But what does a groomsman actually do, and what’s the difference between a best man and a groomsman? In this guide, we’ll go through everything you need to know to take on the role in style.

What is a groomsman?

A groomsman at a wedding is the groom’s equivalent of a bridesmaid. Historically, the role involved practical and protective duties, but today it’s mainly about being the groom’s closest support, sounding board and practical helper during the planning phase and on the wedding day itself.

The difference between a Groomsman, Best Man and Brudsven

A beloved child has many names, but in Sweden there are subtle nuances:

• Groomsman: The classic Swedish title. There may be one or more.
• Best Man: A more Anglo-Saxon term that often refers to the ‘head groomsman’, who bears the greatest responsibility (and often holds the rings).
• Brudsven: An older title often used for younger groomsmen (boys), but in historical contexts it was the title for the men who accompanied the groom.

The groomsman’s duties: Before and during the wedding

To become a ‘super groomsman’, you should go through the following checklist:

• The stag do: The groomsman (together with the Best Man) has primary responsibility for planning and organising a memorable stag do.
• Attire and style: The groomsman’s attire should match the groom’s but never outshine him. Usually, a tailcoat, tuxedo or dark suit is worn, depending on the wedding’s dress code.
• Support during the ceremony: You will often walk into the church alongside the groom or in the procession behind the bride and groom.
• Practical coordinator: During the reception, you’ll support the toastmaster, help guests find their seats and ensure the groom has water (and keeps his nerves in check).

From dowry to modern traditions

In the past, the groomsman had more ceremonial duties linked to old traditions such as the dowry and keeping an eye on the groom. Today, the role focuses more on friendship and creating a fantastic celebration.

How to plan a successful stag do

As the responsibility often falls on you as the groomsman, it’s important to start well in advance. A good stag do isn’t about embarrassing the groom, but about celebrating your friendship. Get the gang together early on, set a budget that everyone can afford, and focus on activities that the groom will actually enjoy – whether it’s a relaxed whisky tasting or a fast-paced adventure.

Details on dress code and etiquette

When it comes to what to wear as a groomsman at a wedding, consistency is key. If there are several groomsmen, it looks smart if you wear matching accessories. This could be anything from identical ties and bow ties to matching socks or corsages. Remember that your outfit should harmonise with the groom’s, but he should always be the centre of attention when it comes to style.

The groomsman’s role during the wedding ceremony

During the ceremony, you’re the groom’s right-hand man – quite literally. You’ll often stand on his right-hand side at the altar. One important detail that many people forget is to keep an eye on the rings – if there’s no ring bearer, it’s your job to bring them forward. Also make sure you have a handkerchief close at hand; it’s not unusual for both the groom and the guests to get a bit emotional during the vows.

Practical tips for the wedding day

As the ‘super groomsman’, it’s your job to sort out the little problems before they become big ones. It’s a good idea to have a small kit ready in the background containing:

• Spare shirt buttons and safety pins.
• Blister plasters (for new party shoes!).
• Mint sweets for fresh breath before the congratulations.
• A copy of the programme so you know exactly when the next item on the agenda begins.