Civil ceremony: Everything you need to know

What does a civil ceremony involve?

Not all weddings start with an obvious choice. Church or not, tradition or something entirely of your own. For many couples today, it’s less about right or wrong and more about finding a format that truly reflects who they are.

The civil ceremony has therefore become an increasingly obvious alternative. Not as a compromise, but as an opportunity. A chance to create a ceremony without constraints, where the venue, atmosphere and style are shaped entirely by you.

We visited Stockholm City Hall to experience what it feels like when simplicity meets grandeur, and to see what actually happens when you strip away all the ‘must-haves’ and simply let love take centre stage.

Civil ceremony

Have you been unable to decide between a church wedding or a civil ceremony? Perhaps you and your partner have different outlooks on life. Perhaps you come from different cultures? Perhaps you’re atheists, or follow different religions? In that case, a civil ceremony could be a good compromise – no one needs to compromise their personal beliefs, and the ceremony can be a wonderful dream come true.

Getting married at the City Hall

We visited Stockholm City Hall on a windy day in early December to get a feel for what it would be like to promise your loved one eternal love in this building. The City Hall’s grand façade made a mighty impression on us. Once inside, we had to walk through countless corridors to reach our destination – the wedding room, also known as the Oval.

Outside the room was a large hall with benches for the couples waiting. In contrast to the waiting room outside, the room itself was a bright and airy space. The beautiful old wallpaper on the oval walls had a calming effect. With the doors open to the adjoining bright hall, the room was very pleasant! It was a pity, however, that the couples had to wait their turn in the hall. Is there really no other system available?

If you
want to get married in private, the Town Hall might just be the best option. Or if you don’t want to invite the whole family but just want your closest friends to join you for a quick ceremony, followed by a simple dinner out. In that case, the Town Hall or the local council wedding venue is the obvious choice. If you simply want to show how much you love each other, rather than organise a party. Other options include: in the woods, in a garden, by a lake, at a castle, at an airport (before you fly off on your honeymoon), in the mountains, at a casino, on a boat, etc.

» Click here to book a civil ceremony at Stockholm City Hall or privately at another venue

Civil ceremony at City Hall vs. a private venue

To find out more about the alternatives to the council wedding venue, we rang Gunnel Strömbäck. Gunnel has been working as an officiant for many years. She has married couples in places such as the VIP lounge at Arlanda Airport and on the ice of Lake Mälaren. Gunnel explains that, throughout her time as an officiant, she has never been turned down
. ‘However, there was one young couple who insisted on having the absolute shortest wedding ceremony. When it was over, they were so disappointed that they wanted to do the civil ceremony again with the longer version – and of course I did!

If you decide to choose an alternative to the venues provided by the local authority for civil ceremonies, there’s plenty to choose from. Perhaps you’d like to get married at an old family farm? At your own home, at one of your parents’ homes, or at a local heritage centre? If you’re looking to organise a slightly larger event, you can always hire a manor house or a castle.

If you live in the Stockholm area, you can have a civil wedding at one of the old farmhouses at Skansen, or at the beautiful Görväln Castle in Järfälla
. ‘Why not get married in a lovely woodland glade? Or in slightly more unusual places, such as in a hot-air balloon, in a mountain cabin or on a boat?‘ suggests Gunnel.

If you’re planning to hire a venue, book well in advance to ensure you can get married on exactly the day you want. Even the Town Hall or the local council’s wedding venue should be booked well in advance
. ‘Bear in mind that you can organise your wedding exactly as you wish. Just because you’re having a civil ceremony doesn’t mean you have to limit the celebrations. Think carefully about how you want your big day to be, and it can be exactly as you wish,” says Gunnel.

Get married at the venue of your dreams

Do you think the Town Hall or the local council wedding venue is a dull setting, and that your big moment will be over in just a few minutes? Then it’s time to start planning. Most officiants will come to the venue of your choice – perhaps you’ve hired a manor house in the village where you grew up, invited family and friends, and booked the local folk music band? There are no restrictions when it comes to civil weddings! Only you can put a stop to it!

But if you want a large civil wedding, you should also start planning well in advance, just as you would for a church wedding. All the invitations need to be sent out in good time – perhaps you’ll need to hire a wedding dress, or borrow an old traditional costume from your grandmother’s sister? If you’re having guests, you should think about what to serve, how many people are coming, and, not least, where to hold the event.

Civil ceremony – here’s how to proceed:

• Download the form for the examination of impediments to marriage. The form must be completed by both of you. In the examination of impediments to marriage, you must provide details of whether either of you has been married before; if so, state the number of times. You must also certify that you are not closely related to one another. It takes about a week for the tax authorities to process this. You will then receive the examination of impediments to marriage back, along with a marriage certificate. You must bring these two forms with you when you meet the officiant.
• Contact your local council and ask for a list of civil marriage officiants. Please note: there is no charge for booking an officiant. Then simply ring and book a time. Most local council officiants wish to meet the couple before the wedding.
• Are you planning to have a civil wedding somewhere other than the local council’s wedding room? If so, don’t forget to ask the officiant whether this is possible. Remember: if one of you doesn’t want it, the other might. Don’t give up until you get your way!
• Don’t forget that two witnesses must be present at the wedding. If you wish to get married in private or do not want to have guests at the ceremony, the local authority wedding office can provide witnesses for weddings held at the Town Hall or in the local authority wedding room.
• If you have a civil ceremony in the council’s wedding room or at the Town Hall, the ceremony is free of charge. If you decide to get married at a castle or manor house, in a hot-air balloon, at a local heritage centre or any other venue that you do not own or can borrow for free, you will incur the cost of hiring the venue. In such cases, you may also need to reimburse the officiant for travel expenses. Your wedding can range from a free ceremony at the Town Hall without rings or new clothes, to being as expensive and lavish as you wish. Read about the civil wedding ceremony step by step.