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Bridesmaid at a Wedding: The Ultimate Guide to Being the Bride’s Rock

Are you going to be a bridesmaid? Here’s the ultimate guide to your responsibilities, how to plan the best hen do, and how to support the bride all the way to the altar.

tärnor på ett bröllop i olika modeller av tärnklänningar
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Being asked to be a bridesmaid at a wedding is one of the greatest honours you can receive. But the role also comes with a great deal of responsibility. As a bridesmaid, you are the bride’s most important source of support, sounding board and practical helper. In this guide, we’ll go through everything you need to know to fulfil the role with flying colours – from the first planning meeting to the last dance on the wedding day.

A bridesmaid is one of the bride’s closest friends or relatives who is given the honour of standing by her side. The chief bridesmaid is often called the Maid of Honour. Your main task is to spread calm and joy, and to ensure that the bride can enjoy her day without worrying about the logistics. Together with the groom’s groomsman, you form the inner circle of the wedding party, supporting the couple throughout the ceremony.

A close-up of a bridesmaid at a wedding, holding an elegant, small bridesmaid's bouquet.
a bridesmaid at a wedding who helps the bride with her wedding dress

Everything you need to know about your role as a bridesmaid, from planning right through to the wedding day. Being a ‘super bridesmaid’ is all about staying one step ahead. Here are the key responsibilities:

  • The hen do: As a bridesmaid, you (often together with the other bridesmaids) are in charge of organising the hen do. It’s about planning a day that reflects the bride’s personality, whether it’s a spa day, an adventure or a cosy dinner.
  • Support with choosing the dress: The bridesmaid is often present when the wedding dress is chosen. Your honest but loving opinion is worth its weight in gold.
  • Practical coordinator: On the wedding day, you’ll help the bride get dressed, keep an eye on the bridal bouquet during the ceremony and make sure her dress looks its best for the photos.
  • Emotional support: Wedding nerves are very real! Your most important role is to be the calming voice when stress starts to set in.

Hen do – Tips for a successful day. The hen do is often the bridesmaid’s biggest project. To make sure it’s a success, bear the following in mind.

  1. The budget: Make sure all participants can afford it. An expensive hen do isn’t always the best.
  2. The bride’s wishes: Remember that the day is for her. If she hates being the centre of attention, avoid embarrassing fancy dress outings in town.
  3. Plan well in advance: Send out a ‘Save the date’ to the bride’s female friends at least three months in advance.

Attire and finances – who pays for the bridesmaids’ dresses?

One of the most common questions ahead of a wedding is who covers the cost of the bridesmaids’ dresses. In Sweden, there are no set rules, but it is often the case that the bridesmaid pays for her own dress if it is a style that can also be worn on other festive occasions. If, however, the bride has very specific requirements for a particular brand or a very expensive design, it is customary for the bride and groom to contribute towards or cover the full cost.

When it comes to styling, such as professional make-up and hair styling on the morning of the wedding, this is often a gift from the bride to her bridesmaids as a thank-you for their help. The most important thing is that the bridesmaids’ outfits complement the wedding’s colour scheme and that the overall look appears cohesive in the photographs. Remember the golden rule: the bridesmaids should be beautiful and well-dressed, but it’s always the bride who should shine the brightest.

The bridesmaid’s schedule – step by step. To ensure your role as a bridesmaid runs as smoothly as possible, it’s a good idea to have a mental schedule.

  • 6–10 months beforehand: Have a chat with the bride about expectations and start brainstorming ideas for the hen do.
  • 3–4 months beforehand: Book activities for the hen do and make sure you’ve bought your dress (and had it altered by a tailor, if necessary).
  • 1 month beforehand: Break in your shoes! You’ll be standing and walking a lot on the wedding day, so make sure they’re comfortable.
  • Wedding week: Check in with the toastmaster and the other members of the bridal party so you’re all on the same page about the running order.

Bridesmaid’s survival kit.

Safety pins and clear nail varnish (for runs in tights).

Wet wipes and mints.

The same lip gloss the bride is using.

Headache tablets and plasters for blisters.

As a bridesmaid at a wedding, do you need more visual inspiration for everything from colour themes for dresses to games for the hen do?
Pinterest – the perfect place to create mood boards together with the other bridesmaids ahead of the big day!

Find the best activities for the hen do!

In our extensive supplier directory, you’ll find loads of inspiration and companies specialising in hen do activities.

BRÖLLOPSGUIDEN

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